學會讚美，帶給別人快樂，你會更快樂！Society's praise, bring happiness to others,

        學會讚美，帶給別人快樂，你會更快樂！

                         Society's praise, bring happiness to others,

                                  you will be happier!

 

 

我能不能幫助別人更快樂?一年多前我看過一部電影叫《一路玩到掛（TheBucketList）》，講一個人聽到自己罹患癌症噩耗時，會想做什麼事？

Can I help others happier? I saw a film about  one year ago <<(The Bucket List) >>,While saying one person  hearing oneself suffer from the sad news of cancer alone, what will be wanted to do?

 

故事從一個億萬富翁（由傑克尼克遜所飾演）在病房遇到了另一個修車工（由摩根費里曼所飾演）講起，兩個人都因癌症住進醫院，走到了人生盡頭。Story from piece billionaire  meet another one car repair work, two people because cancer live in hospital, go to life end.

??

過世前想看看、想體驗一些事 Thing wanted to see, want to experience before passing away

 

有一天，億萬富翁看到技工一直在書寫，很好奇追問才發現他在寫人生清單，他剛進大學時，哲學老師叫他們列出的一份人生清單，寫出他們在過世前想做、想看以及想體驗的事。

 One day, the billionaire sees skilled worker has been writing, very curious to question that just finds he is writing the tabulation in life, when he just entered the university, the tabulation of a part life that the philosophical teacher asked them to list, write out they want do, wantwatch and want thing that experience before not passing away.

 

億萬富翁聽了之後覺得這個點子太棒了，隨後也列出自己的人生清單，兩個人還結伴做了許多想做的事，包括賽車、打獵和旅行，在世界各地留下許多快樂的足跡。                                                            The billionaire thinks this idea excellent after hearing, list the tabulation of one's own life too subsequently, two people have also done a lot of things wanted to do in a group, including the racing-cycle, going hunting and travelling, leave a lot of happy footprints in all parts of the world.

有一天到了埃及金字塔，技工突然變得很認真嚴肅，不管是表情還是話語都很慎重，他說埃及人一直有個傳說，說人死後到天堂門口會被問兩個問題，回答的內容會決定你往哪裡走。                            One day having reached Pyramid of Egypt, the skilled worker became very conscientiously serious suddenly, no matter the expression or words are very cautious, he says Egyptians have had a legend all the time, say people get the intersection of paradise and gate will ask two question whether content that answer will determine you move there die.

第一個問題是：你在世上的這一生快樂嗎？                                                       The first question is: are you happy this life in the world?

億萬富翁聽了之後沉默不語，因為他雖然擁有私人飛機、豪宅和美食，十分富有，極其享受，但他回答不出來，因為他的確不快樂，他知道有很多東西不是金錢能換得的。                                                  The billionaire keeps silent after hearing, because though he has personal aircraft, luxurious house and table delicacies, very rich, enjoy deeply, but he can not answer out, because he is really unhappy, he knows there are a lot of things not the money can be got in return.

他無法回答催促著趕快說第二個問題，技工說：那你在世上這一生有沒有幫助別人找到快樂？」 He is unable to answer, urge and speak the second question quickly, the skilled worker says: ' then have you helped others to find in the world happily this life? '

億萬富翁聽了更加沉默，甚至生氣，因為他是個大老闆，對人極為嚴苛，常常挑剔找麻煩，不要說幫助人快樂了，甚至還讓人很不快樂，是別人痛苦的來源。加上自己還離過四次婚，唯一的一個女兒不相往來，他這一輩子從來沒幫助別人快樂過。 The billionaire has heard more reticently, even angry, because he is a boss, extremely tight and severe to people, often look for trouble nitpickingly, don't say that help people to be happy, even make people very unhappy, it is painful sources of others. In addition, still divorced four times by oneself, an only daughter has no dealings with each other, he will have never helped others to be happy in lifetime.

減少批評、責備、抱怨，才會快樂起來,我對那一幕印象極為深刻，我們現代人都忙著工作，競爭壓力很大，如果我沒猜錯，很多人跟我一樣，從來沒想過第一個問題：「我這一生快不快樂？」而對第二個問題，反應還會是：「問了還不是白問，我還能怎麼樣？還不是得上班、下班？」??實際上是不是這樣？當然不一定。 Reduce, criticize, blame, complain, can happy to stand up, I to scene that impression extremely deep, we moderns are all busy with the work, the competition is very large in pressure, if I have not guessed wrong, a lot of people have never thought of the first question like me: ' am I happy this life? ' to second question, it reacts to be can also: ' ask that does not ask in vain yet, how am I still? Must not go to work, come off duty? ' In fact it is like this? Certainly uncertain.

同樣的環境職場，同樣的工作，如果我們很能珍惜自己所擁有的，感恩惜福，也會在逆境中抱持正向態度，可以讓自己快樂的程度就不一樣。                                                                               The environmental job market equally, the same work, if we are good at cherishing oneself what has been had, feel grateful and cherish the good fortune, will embrace and hold a forward attitude in the adverse circumstance too and can let one's own happy intensity be different.

至於第二個問題：「我們有沒有幫助別人更快樂？」可以想的東西就更多了，似乎跟第一個問題關係很密切。一個不快樂的人，很難帶給別人快樂，因為想法、作為都是負面的。                              As for the second question: ' it is happier whether we have helped others? ' things that can think are more, it seems that it is in very close relations to follow the first question. One unhappy person, bring others happiness while being difficult very, idea, as negative.

卡內基講得很清楚，人要減少批評、責備、抱怨和挑毛病，才會快樂起來，也才有可能跟別人好好相處溝通，帶給別人快樂。                                                                                 Carnegie very clearly talks, people should reduce to criticize, blame, complain and find fault, can happy to stand up, get along, link up with someone else probably too, bring happiness to others.

我有個朋友是快遞公司總經理，有一天他的助理跟他說：「總經理，拜託你不要這麼愁眉苦臉的好不好？」他生氣地說：「難道我連自己不快樂的權利都沒有嗎？」那小姐說：「你真的沒有權利愁眉苦臉，因為你害得我們的工作士氣也很低落。」                                                                                       It is expressed to company's general manager that I have a friend, his assistant tells him one day: ' general manager, could you please don't need such ones that have a worried look very well? ' he says angrily: ' do not I have even one's own unhappy right? ' that young lady says: ' you really have no right and have a worried look, because you make our working morale very low. '

在家裡也是，如果父母愁眉苦臉，孩子也沒辦法快樂起來，影響一家人。自己積極正向，不僅自己能快樂，也會大大影響別人的。 At home too, if parents have a worried look, child manage getting happy either, influence whole family. Oneself is positive and forward, not only oneself can be happy, also will influence the others' one greatly.

學會讚美，帶給別人快樂 Society's praise, bring happiness to others

我最近在看巴菲特的自傳，裡面提到員工都很喜歡跟他一起工作，因為他很會讚美別人。其實巴菲特以前並不是快樂的人，內向、害羞和退縮，他是在二十幾歲參加卡內基訓練之後改變的，他在自傳裡提到卡內基有16次之多，講到他如何從退縮害羞變得有自信，懂得跟別人溝通，成為一個成功的企業家，甚至讓他娶到老婆。                                                            I have been reading Buffett's autobiography recently, have mentioned the staff like working with him very much inside, because he can praise others very well. In fact Buffett was not a happy person in the past, introversive, shy and shrinking back, he changes after participating in Carnegie's training at more than 20 years old, he mentions in the autobiography Carnegie has the amount of time 16, talk about how he is shy from shrinking back to become confident, know how to communicate with others, become a successful entrepreneur, even let him marry the wife.

那是他在一次訓練得獎後，十分開心快樂，晚上才有自信開口跟女朋友求婚，結果一舉成功，更加深他日後持續改變，愈來愈有信心。                                                                                   That is that he is very happy and happy after training win the prize, it was not confident to open one's mouth in the evening to propose with the girlfriend, the result succeed in at one blow, deeper he will change continuously in the future, more and more confident.

我們在台灣長大的人，特別是40到60歲的人，不太會也不好意思讚美別人。但要帶給別人快樂，就要先學會讚美別人和聆聽別人說話，這部份我們以後慢慢再談。                                                    We are  the person that grow up in Taiwan,  Especial from 40 to 60 -year-old person, can even too shy to praise someone else very much. But to bring happiness to others, one should learn to praise others and listen to others speak first, we will talk slowly and slowly afterwards in this part.

寫《追逐日光》的尤金·歐凱利是美國KPMG會計事務所的總裁兼執行長，他也是在發現自己得腦瘤，生命只剩100天後，寫下最想做的事，結果發現前幾項都是想去跟別人說感謝和讚美的話。        Eugene and Ou and Kelly who writes " chasing the sunlight " is president and concurrently executive chairman of U.S.A. KPMG accounting firm, he find oneself get cerebroma, life leave after the 100 day only, write down, want thing that make most too, several items are to speak to others and thank and praise for and praise's before finding finally.

他寫信給一個高中同學，說自己跟他在一起時有多開心，結果對方沒回應，他乾脆打電話去，才知道對方根本沒收到，他就在電話裡說了起來，對方也很真誠地回答他：「你在我們班上什麼都是跑第一的，第一個當總裁，第一個做什麼什麼的，現在連去天堂都是第一個的，但我們早晚都會在天堂見。」 He write to one the intersection of high school and classmate, say how happily stay, with him it will be oneself, the other side did not react finally, he phoned the universe fragily, just knew the other side did not receive, he says on the phone, the other side very answers him sincerely too: ' you anything wins the race in our class, work as a president first, what is done first, it is even to go to the paradise the first now, but we will meet in the paradise sooner or later. '

尤金·歐凱利在死前給我們的建議就是，不管你現在幾歲，身體健康狀況如何，都要把你想做的事情儘量往前移，不要等到五十幾、六十幾才做，現在就去做。                                       Kelly, Ou of Eugene, give suggestion of us, just, leave the intersection of you and odd year old now alone in front of death, how is the health status of body, all try hard to move the thing that you want to do forward, don't wait until more than 50, more than 60 are just done, do now.

我看完書，立刻打電話給我在美國的妹妹，告訴她我們以前在家裡有多快樂 I finish reading the book, make a phone call to my younger sister in U.S.A. at once, tell her how happy we were at home,

(曾有田點傳師提供)